VWB Blog When we have experienced trauma, our brain changes the way it responds to stress and danger. This can lead to fawning behavior as a way to cope with the trauma. Keep reading to learn more about the link between fawning and trauma response.
What is fawning, and how is it linked to trauma?
Trauma can be a very overwhelming experience, and it’s not uncommon for people to respond to it in different ways. One way that people may respond to trauma is by fawning. Fawning is a type of trauma response in which a person excessively flatters or praises another person in an attempt to gain their approval or attention. Fawning can also be used as a way to avoid conflict or disapproval by doing everything possible to meet the demands of others.
People who fawn often feel like they need to be around the person they are fawning over in order to feel safe or accepted. They may also feel like they need to do whatever the other person asks of them in order to maintain their approval. Fawning can be a way to avoid dealing with difficult emotions or situations and can be very harmful to both the fawner and the person they are fawning over.
There are many theories about why fawning may occur after a traumatic event. One theory is that fawning is a way for individuals to feel as though they are in control of their situation, and it allows them to avoid dealing with the trauma directly. Another theory is that fawning occurs as a result of changes in the brain caused by the trauma. These changes can affect how individuals process information and can lead to alterations in mood and behavior.
What kinds of trauma can trigger fawning behavior?
There are many types of trauma that can trigger fawning behavior. Examples of events that can cause a person to fawn over another person include:
- Childhood trauma such as physical, mental, or sexual abuse
- Domestic abuse
- Being mugged or assaulted
- Witnessing a violent act
- Losing a loved one
- Facing a life-threatening illness
When someone experiences any type of traumatic event, they may react by fawning over the person who they believe can help them. This may be a way of seeking comfort and trying to establish a connection with someone who can offer support. It may also be a way to avoid attention or conflict, especially in cases of domestic or child abuse.
How can you address fawning?
If you feel like you are fawning over someone, or if someone is fawning over you, it’s important to understand that this is a response to trauma and not a sign of true appreciation or love. It’s also important to understand that fawning is not healthy for either party involved. If you are fawning over someone, try to take some time for yourself to process your trauma and find healthier ways to connect with others. If someone is fawning over you, be honest with them and let them know that you don’t appreciate their behaviour. If they continue to fawn over you, it may be best to distance yourself from them.
Therapy is perhaps the best way to work through fawning and trauma responses. One of the ways a therapist can help with fawning is to help the individual understand why they are fawning and what purpose it serves for them. Oftentimes, people fawn because they want to be liked and feel important. They may feel like they are not good enough as they are and need to put on an act in order to be accepted. A therapist can help the individual learn to like and accept themselves for who they are without needing to fawn and can also help the individual learn to build healthy relationships based on mutual respect and equality. Further, the therapist can help the individual work through their trauma and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) to find healthier ways to cope.