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marriage counseling

7 Reasons to Start Marriage Counseling

VWB Blog 1 year ago 21

A survey showed that 90% of couples who received marriage counseling found it helpful. It also showed that 65% of couples saw an improvement in their relationship from counseling.

There are many reasons why a couple may need to go to marriage counseling. This is more common than people realize and should not have a stigma around it.

In many cases, going to counseling can be a healthy way of growing closer as a couple. It is not only reserved for couples who are on the verge of divorce like mini assume.

Keep reading to find out some of the common reasons why couples seek marriage counseling.

1. Poor Communication

One of the most common reasons for relationship counseling is poor communication. Many couples struggle to communicate the way that they need, to stay close.

This doesn’t even have to be a serious issue within your marriage. Even the simplest of understandings can get out of control if neither party is communicating with the other.

This can also happen if one of you is avoidant and non-confrontational. There is a certain level of confrontation that is needed in a marriage if communication is going to be a priority.

If a couple is not able to communicate about problems or the needs they have, more issues will develop. Communication is the backbone of a healthy relationship and staying close to each other.

2. Inability to Move on

You may start choosing a counselor because of unforgiveness in the marriage. There may be past things that the two of you worked through, but there is residual resentment.

The inability to move on is something that often occurs in marriages. You may think that something has been put behind you when in reality, it is still there, causing problems.

The most common example of this is if one of you cheated. A partner who cheats may have gone the extra mile to fix the issue, but the unforgiveness is still there.

Maybe you lied about something that caused trust issues. Even if you work through things, there can still be problems that linger that require counseling.

3. Reoccurring Issues

Some types of counseling focused on reoccurring issues within the marriage. A lot of couples have issues with this if there are problems that come up over and over again.

Most of the time this takes the form of an argument that is introduced on a regular basis. Maybe the two of you can’t decide on future plans or keep arguing about a difference between how you feel.

Issues that keep coming up needed to be addressed, otherwise, they will only grow worse. Small arguments will become larger, and misunderstandings will eventually cut off communication.

Marriage counseling introduces a third party who can analyze the situation without biases. They may be able to provide a solution that neither of you ever thought of.

4. You Argue a Lot

Arguments are normal in a healthy relationship and don’t require you to look into your counseling options. That being said, too much arguing is a bad sign.

A relationship should not have excessive arguing that doesn’t lead to the problem being solved. Arguing is often part of communication and helps both of you come to a resolution.

If your arguments are starting for no reason or happening repeatedly, this isn’t productive. These kinds of arguments can even be petty and can be a way to suddenly dig at one another.

5. No Spark

Many marriages may eventually encounter an issue with the spark not being there anymore. This is most common in marriages that are older, around 10 to 15 years.

It is very normal for couples to become less romantic as time goes by. This is something that will happen to all couples if they don’t put in the effort to keep the spark there.

Unlike what many people assume, the romantic spark does not sustain itself. Every couple must add romance and excitement to the relationship to keep the spark alive.

Some couples may start to become more like roommates than romantic partners. This could put a strain on the relationship and result in both looking for romance elsewhere.

6. There Is No Intimacy

Marriage counseling is a necessary option if there is a lack of intimacy. Intimacy is a big part of sustaining a marriage and keeping people in love with one another.

It is more common than people realize for couples to slowly move away from intimacy. It often happens after children are introduced to the family, taking up time and energy.

Your intimacy needs may have also changed along with your sex drive. No matter what is causing the issue, it is important to find a solution to it.

A lack of intimacy can create distance as well as the potential for one person to look for intimacy elsewhere.

7. Different Parenting Styles

When children are introduced into a marriage, things are going to change drastically. One issue that people often experience is different parenting styles.

Maybe you practice tough love and like to keep your children in line. But your partner may have a much softer approach that you do not believe is as useful.

Different parenting approaches can cause conflict in a marriage. This is often something that couples have a hard time finding a solution to if they both dig in their heels.

Reasons to Consider Marriage Counseling

There are many reasons why you may want to start going to marriage counseling. This can be a great option if there are marital issues that the two of you can’t solve yourselves.

Did you enjoy reading this article on marriage counseling? Keep reading to find other helpful family and relationship content.

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